{"id":14667,"date":"2015-05-18T17:00:03","date_gmt":"2015-05-18T22:00:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/?p=14667"},"modified":"2015-05-18T20:30:46","modified_gmt":"2015-05-19T01:30:46","slug":"seniors-speaks-the-feeling-of-onwards","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/2015\/05\/18\/seniors-speaks-the-feeling-of-onwards\/","title":{"rendered":"Seniors Speaks: The Feeling of Onwards"},"content":{"rendered":"

As the class of 2015 counts down to its graduation, we’ll be counting through this year’s Senior Speaks. Beginning with our first installment, here is Shelly Teng’s article\u00a0The Feeling of Onwards.<\/em><\/p>\n

I\u2019m sitting here with 18 days left to mark on my calendar and for some reason, I can\u2019t seem to find a way to describe this elusive terminus I\u2019m caught in. Soon, all 194 of us will be gathered together on a stage, where we will not only lift silk sleeves above our heads but also the countless memories we\u2019ve created. This time, unfortunately, will also be the last we can look around and find the same collection of people we\u2019ve grown to know throughout these past three years.<\/p>\n

I know this is true, but somehow, I can\u2019t quite describe this feeling of onwards. It\u2019s not quite elation, and it\u2019s not quite sadness either. I feel like, more than anything, I\u2019m struck with a bittersweet reluctance\u2026a yearning\u00a0and a fear. I\u2019m scared of losing this interconnected web that we\u2019re all a part of, because the truth is, the way we\u2019ve come to know our class is so particular to this IMSA community.<\/p>\n

Although our \u201cpack the stands\u201d are always half-assed and our sense of class unity may be decidedly absent, I feel like this campus is blanketed by a different type of spirit – we might not bleed blue and white, but our veins course together in a different way. We share sentiments that others can\u2019t ever relate to \u2013 homesickness, 3am fire alarms, endless in-room violations. And most importantly, we shared these things with the same people for 3 years.<\/p>\n

Although I don\u2019t doubt that I\u2019ll find the same strength of friendships later in life, part of me really doubts that I won\u2019t find the same degree of intimacy across an entire campus. You see, missing people isn\u2019t always about the people you truly know. Your closest friends? You\u2019ll see them again in due time. No, rather, I\u2019m talking about the people we call our \u201cluck friends\u201d or the people that you randomly know had a crush on so-and-so just because of the wildfire gossip culture that our school breeds. I\u2019m talking about the friends of your friends or the people that you see during that one second mod break. I\u2019m talking about the people that we won\u2019t ever find a chance to meet up with again, because we weren\u2019t close enough to them to deliberately seek them out. For some reason, it\u2019s this sense of familiarity that I\u2019m afraid of losing and not having.<\/p>\n

Looking around me, every spot on this campus seems to carry its own reminder of youth and recklessness \u2013 procrastination, staying up too late, breaking rules. But at the same time, they also remind me of growing up and my own fragility \u2013 divulging secrets at 5am, tear shed, heartbreak. We shared some of our rawest moments with the people here, and that sort of comfort is just something I\u2019m not entirely ready to give up just yet.<\/p>\n

Although I know my high school career is quickly coming to an end, part of me isn\u2019t ready for \u201conwards\u201d. Don\u2019t get me wrong \u2013 I\u2019m just as excited as the next person for college and starting a new life. But at the same time, I can\u2019t deny the fact that leaving this intimate comfort makes me want to live in the past for a little longer. IMSA, somehow, has become a place I\u2019ve both cursed and loved, and I\u2019m afraid that we won\u2019t find such a thorough interconnectedness again.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

As the class of 2015 counts down to its graduation, we’ll be counting through this year’s Senior Speaks. Beginning with our first installment, here is…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":151,"featured_media":14680,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1019],"tags":[1817,2428,2429],"coauthors":[2298,2316],"class_list":["post-14667","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-imsanews","tag-senior-speaks","tag-shelly","tag-teng"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14667","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/151"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=14667"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14667\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14684,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14667\/revisions\/14684"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/14680"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=14667"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=14667"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=14667"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/coauthors?post=14667"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}