{"id":18991,"date":"2017-10-19T00:44:57","date_gmt":"2017-10-19T05:44:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/?p=18991"},"modified":"2017-10-20T10:00:43","modified_gmt":"2017-10-20T15:00:43","slug":"high-death-toll-predicted-for-annual-2-week-heating-stall-in-halls","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/2017\/10\/19\/high-death-toll-predicted-for-annual-2-week-heating-stall-in-halls\/","title":{"rendered":"High Death Toll Predicted for Annual \u20182-Week Heating Stall&#8217; in Halls"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Across campus, dorm lights flicker on, parkas cram into wardrobes, and administration prepares to shut off heating in another \u201c2-Week Stall\u201d in order to freeze away a few more contributors to the Sodexo food bill.<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s an annual tradition for IMSA maintenance to wait to turn on heating service in the halls for 2 weeks after temperatures drop. Under the guise of confirming that heating is financially sustainable for the year, they leave students shivering in their beds at freezing temperatures. \u201cI always thought IMSA didn\u2019t want to kill us,\u201d grimaced frost-scarred senior <strong>Mounisha Kovour (&#8217;18)<\/strong>. \u201cBut the 2-week Stall proved me wrong.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>When well-prepared students returned to campus on Monday, trucks of comforters followed them in. \u201cWinter is coming,\u201d whispered one fearful junior in explanation. Over his shoulder, he lugged a bag of acorns.<\/p>\n<p>Procrastinating students should be aware that this week\u2019s temperatures will plunge well below freezing, with snow expected on Thursday. These students are advised to cuddle with friends \u2014 if they have any left alive.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Across campus, dorm lights flicker on, parkas cram into wardrobes, and administration prepares to shut off heating in another \u201c2-Week Stall\u201d in order to freeze&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":303,"featured_media":18993,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2490,2621],"tags":[2788,2787,1147],"coauthors":[2754],"class_list":["post-18991","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor","category-humor-satire","tag-calm-down","tag-its-a-joke","tag-satire"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18991","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/303"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18991"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18991\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":19139,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18991\/revisions\/19139"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/18993"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18991"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18991"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18991"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.imsa.edu\/acronym\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/coauthors?post=18991"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}