satire

Behold, the Vending Machines

Vending Machines Behold, the IMSA mission statement. The mission of IMSA, the world’s leading teaching and learning laboratory for imagination and inquiry, is to ignite…



Old Cafe has a New Look

IMSA students are not very picky about where they sit. First one U-bench, then another, then against a wall, then on the floor. However, while…


IMSA Charters Rugby Team

IMSA statisticians  recently released a short statement discussing their recent discovery that students who actively participate on a rugby team are significantly taller than their non-athletic counterparts. They argued that because…



“Go Green”: A Red Plot?

By: Tejas Joshi, Opinions staff writer Warning! You are constantly being inundated with environmentalist propaganda! Assuming, of course (in the words of Dr. Victory), that you…