Humor

True Account of a College Acceptance

Dear Applicant, Congratulations! We are excited to inform you that you have been accepted into Star College. We’re looking forward to you joining our community of sleepwalkers, math nuts, bio…


How to Survive Outside the Bubble

Over extended, IMSA students will return to their homes for at least three and a half days, during which they may be exposed to the outside world and its happenings….


Sophomore Rush Rates Reach Record High

to sophomore rush – v. to get into an IMSA relationship before Homecoming of one’s sophomore year Despite consistent warnings, sophomore rush rates have reached a record high this year,…



The Mysterious Case of Blake Truman

Co-authored by Mara Adams. It has been brought to the attention of the Acronym staff that one of IMSA’s students, Blake Truman, has been witnessed leading around three teenaged blobs….


The Teacher Conspiracy

AURORA, IL – A new, undercover study has revealed that IMSA’s teachers are plotting against their students. Recently, our reporters contacted the Acronym’s unassociated adult liaison, Mr. Spy, in order…